In Utah it is inevitable that you will be asked these questions in this order:
1. How old are you?
2. Are you married?
You can watch the looks on their faces go from simply gathering information, to a look of concern when you say "No, I'm not married." A married friend's father once asked me these questions and I remember the confusion on his face.
His next question: "Well, why in the world not?!" Now keep in mind this was several years ago when I was in my early twenties. My response was this: "I'm working full-time for the state government, volunteering for a non-profit, and working on my undergraduate degree, and not really concerned with my marital status right now."
Pretty impressive, right?! I'd think so. His response was one word: "Oh." That's it! All he had to say! This man was obviously following the typical Utah path, getting married at 20, having lots of kids, and church and family are the most important thing in his life.
When I look at most of my single girlfriends I see very successful careers; they're all smart and attractive. some have boyfriends, some don't. They have all experienced this awkward conversation at some point.
Being a single, successful woman in Utah should not be something to feel shame about. Of course, it is easier said than done. Having this conversation over and over can be frustrating, but we just have to remember that there are so many places where our life choices are viewed as normal!
Education? Independence? Knowing who you are and what you want from life? Good for you!
